Memoirs
by Pic-Kee-Toi
Summary: Story of the life and experiences of a young tortured,confused,"gifted" girl..
1. Writer's Note

Disclaimer:I do not own any of the Southern Vampire Mysteries/True Blood characters,plots or anything. I only own my O/C characters,plots and extras...

This is my first try at a fan fiction so please just bear with me,if its too lame or something i'll take criticism with an open mind.I'll try to upload chapters asap,I already have about five witten and saved to my anyone who reads my story I'm grateful for you using you time to glance/read what i have wrote...Thanks Bunches!

Writer's Note

This whole situation is too funny to me. I was approached about four months ago to write a sorta "memoirs/ tell all" book about my life. At first I thought I was being tricked, but as the weeks went on and the emails persisted from the editor, I realized it was a legitimate offer. So as it took me a week to finally decide if I wanted a book out there for the public to read about my life, I finally made up my mind. And as you the reader knows I decided to go through with it. As some of you know I'm a "newly" retired model and a soon to be mother. I've read all the bad publicity for many years; people don't fully understand why I am wrapped so tightly into the "vampire community". Hopefully once everything is put on the table, people won't be so quick to judge and label me "just another dumb fangbanger". As some of you know I've walked runways around the world.

I've walked every kind of "catwalk", from the smaller ones of New Orleans back in the beginning of my career to the most elite ones of New York in my last show. I've went from modeling wedding and prom dresses for local designers in Shreveport, La to modeling obscure clothing for the influential designers of Milan. In a sense "I've done it all". And through it all certain people (some of those people actually being vampires) were there with me. Now granted the road hasn't been easy and I've strayed at times, but I never gave up. And that's thanks to four people (vampires included) in particular. Some of them have meant so much to me through the years that I believe if they hadn't been there that I'd not be the person I am today. And others "ugh" well I wish they'd gotten the point years ago and left me alone.

As many people know my agent from day one has been of the "undead" persuasion, and even at one time my legal guardian was also a vampire. Two of my best friends and my biggest foe are also vampires. The one I believed to had been the love of my life (ha ironic kinda) is also a vampire. I guess in a nutshell my life has been filled with vampire association since I was the young age of 16. I'm not saying I haven't "human" friends or family because I I cherish them to no end, I live by a strict belief that "without family I'd be nothing".

Now don't' go assuming I only socialize with vampires because that's the farthest thing from the truth. I'm not prejudice in the least (even though I've been accused of being so on more than a few occasions). I've had times when I've been surrounded by only vampires, or only werewolves, witches, fairies, humans, and everything in between. Also don't think I've lived the privileged life that many have assumed I did. I've lived years with my family in a "normal" dwelling living paycheck to paycheck, I lived months with a distant relative in what some would consider a "shack" only surviving on the things nature supplied us with, and I lived a couple of years with Bill in his old decayed plantation home having the means to exist better but him not having the want too. I've spent my share of time living in basically a "dungeon", once because it was either that or find myself dead and another time because I was involved with a crazed vampire. If combined I've lived about 18 months in hotels in different cities, states even countries. So as I have stated" I've done it all".

Many people have asked me"Cassandria why do you always end back up in Louisiana?" And in case you were wondering the same thing, I'll tell u the longer version of what I've told others. I feel content and happy being within the borders of my home state, I feel whole when I'm in Louisiana. Now granted I've been to many places most only dream about going to, but honest nothing compares to Louisiana. Nowhere has our kind of "landscaping" our variety of different ethnicities, our beliefs (as crazy and backwoods as they might be their still imbedded into us) and nowhere on this earth can compare when it comes to our foods. Besides all of that Louisiana is where my family is. Everything that has had a hand in making me is tied to Louisiana.

I know a few people know of my "little extras" but not to the full extent. Those little "extras" get drained at times and going back home always recharges them and me. I may be an internationally known model, a "gift" amongst the supernatural world, a "powerful witch" in the eyes of some but really deep down I'm merely a southern down home girl. The portrayal of Scarlett O'Hara being so intent on saving her home wasn't far off mark. We're bought up to fight for our homes, because in turn our homes/houses represent family.

I guess we'll see how far this goes and how much about myself and my past I'll allocate. There's no knowing what I will or won't reveal about the things that have made me the person I am. So I guess it's all in the editors hands if its "juicy" enough to even share with the peoples of this world. I'm still deciding on where and how to start…


	2. Where to Start

**Disclaimer:I do not own any of the Southern Vampire Mysteries/True Blood characters,plots or anything. I only own my O/C characters,plots and extras...**

**Where to start, where to start?**

I was born a poor black man…that's a line from one of my favorite movies (The jerk).

Ok enough with the jokes; maybe I'm the only one who thought it was funny. I was born though (weren't we all?) I was born at a bad time in my family, because of multiple deaths having occurred. The people that were considered the backbones of my family died either months after I was born or no more than a couple months before I was. My entire family was in turmoil so in a way my birth was overlooked. I was born a bastard (not having a father nor knowing where the person was that had a hand in creating me). From the minute I came into this world I was the "black sheep" at first merely because I didn't resemble anyone else. And later because of the choices I've made. I was born with pumpkin colored wavy hair, grass green eyes and a pale complexion. Which when compared to everyone else, is very rare. My appearance was such a shock to everyone because of our ancestry. I am descendant from Native Americans (my mother is about 1/3 so that would make me what?) and Acadian French. Naturally everyone else in my family is dark haired, have dark eyes and a bronze to tanned complexion.

I was the 50th female grandchild born to my mother's parents. I was the last child to be given "a gift" from my mother's grandmother. My great granny Bern was a well known "witch/faith healer". It's rumored that she was as powerful in "Hoodoo" as the infamous Marie Laveau was in Voodoo. Every female child born when Granny Bern was around was bestowed a "gift". Most of the females in my family are simply "sensitive". But me I found out at a young age I was even more different than my cousins, aunts, and siblings. At the age of five I realized I was telekinetic, by the age of eight I realized I could hear things people thought if they thought something strongly, by the age of eleven I had my first serious Déjà vu moment. Then at thirteen I found out that I could manipulate "the elements". Now that was a shocker!

But as teenagers do I made bad decisions. I found myself in dire situations. Drugs and corruption were a huge part of my daily existence. I'm not making excuses but I hadn't any "family" life though. My mother had gotten married to her husband and she pushed her (my) family out. She refused to let me or my sisters take part any longer in the traditions we had with our family members for so long. She became incensed if anyone even mentioned "our family's gifts". It was a vast and tricky change to make, more for me than anyone else.

Then tragedy stuck my family again and my mother's mother died suddenly. That was the proverbial straw that broke the camels back (camels back being my sense of self). My grandma (or as I always called her my Jovee) was my everything. She was the person who knew about all of "my gifts", she was the person who helped me control them; she was my light in the dark. Once she departed from me though I completely lost it. I felt alone amongst a sea of nothingness.

Weeks after laying Jovee to rest I found myself no longer in school(even though I had good grades)I found myself in lots of troublesome situations(troublesome as in literally illegal), and the drug usage was at max capacity(capacity to point I didn't know night from day, left from right).

Even though my world around me was falling apart I was in a sense happy. I was "in love". My being in love was of course in an extreme way, because of the condition my life was in. The love I felt for him was raw and new, I had had a few boyfriends before but nothing like what Adrian and I had. Everything with us was so hasty and severe. From the feelings I felt for him to the way we'd share our time together. The drug usage between us made everything so much more intense. First loves, they either stand the test of time and are blissful or they fail and are distressing. Ours regretfully ended disastrously for me that is. My mother was shipping me away to live with her distant cousin because of my bad behavior. I loathed having to leave my life and friends but seeing as I had just turned 15 I hadn't a say in the matter. Not meaning I didn't voice my aversion to being sent away, because oh I did (loudly and often).

I was rudely shipped to live in Palle Vilatte, La. This is out in the middle of nowheres in Renard parish. And when I say the middle of nowheres I mean it literally not figuratively. There wasn't even a high school in the "town", it was all woods and bayous, dirt roads and scarcely placed homes. I had to commute via a bus to Bon Temps daily just for school. Even before I'd get to the designated bus stop though I had to walk ½ mile down dirt roads. Then I'd have to take a nearly half hour bus ride to the school. Living with my mom's cousin Addie Mae was like living during the pioneer days. We lived in a rundown shack; it was built as a hunting camp about 60 years ago. The walls were paper thin, it had only one bedroom and one room that looked to had been built as a storage room. It had one very simple and outdated bathroom. A living room and a kitchen/dining room, all rooms were painted the same dull yellow and had the same nasty gray wood flooring. The furnishings of the entire house considered of; a threadbare brown 30 year old sofa, two wobbly uneven handmade end tables(that was the living room),a stained tiny kitchen table, four straight backed wooden chairs, a fridge that I still believe was one of the firsts ever, and a stove(kitchen)…Addie Mae's bedroom had a double bed, a tall wooden dresser, two night stands with lamps on them… my bedroom/the storage room had a fold up cot and a two drawer dresser nothing else…the bathroom consisted of the regular things bathtub(no shower), sink and counter, and a toilet. My bedroom had no windows, I recall asking Addie Mae one day why it didn't and her reply was" because they used to store the meets in that room and the less light the longer it stayed fresh." Yuck right?

Addie Mae was in my opinion a nutcase! She was a religious fanatic; she believed almost everything was "unholy". She was a firm believer in beatings and torture, she thought the simpler the way a person lived the better off they were. She hated people who were different; she detested people with their own opinions. My family's "gifts" somehow didn't get passed on through her grandparents (her grandmother and my great granny were sisters). It's rumored that when her grandmother got married to her grandfather he persuaded her to use her gifts for the darker side of living. They used her grandmother's gifts to accumulate riches that they squandered away, Addie Mae's grandmother and my granny Bern ended up having a huge altercation which ended with Granny Bern stripping her sister of her powers/gifts.

Life with Addie Mae was HELL.

Daily she would mock and or straight out insult me, merely because of my looks. By the time I went to live with her I was nearing 5'8 give or take, I was between 110-120lbs, my pumpkin colored hair was bleached blonde with flamingo pink and jet black streaks. My hair was mid back length and straight as a board (thanks to many hair treatments via my friends). I had very tiny hips and waist to match; my "bust" was in the small almost tiny range. I had a nose and belly button piercings and nine earring holes between both ears. Moving in with Addie Mae I bought my "city" wardrobe with me, which consisted of; many tank tops, halter styled shirts, above the knee length skirts, tight jeans, and a few pairs of shoes. My clothes weren't the most expensive designer brands but they weren't what I ended up having to go around in. The day before I was due for my first day of school at Bon Temps High, Addie Mae decided what I could and couldn't wear any longer. She threw away just about everything I had bought with me except a few pairs of jeans. And when I say threw away I mean she took them out to the bayou that was about a mile in the woods to the right of her house and tossed all of my clothes into it. She said only unholy, vile tramps wore clothing like that. And that everything about me was going to reflect on her, if I went around looking like a tramp then the community's opinion of her was going to be tarnished.

That day was the day of my first beating, Addie Mae style.

I had a fit about her throwing away my clothes and the fact that she believed she had a right to dictate every part of my life. As Addie Mae was tossing the remaining pieces of my clothes into the bayou I ran up next to her and grabbed onto a piece of clothing. I stared at her and said" what are you doing? You're a crazy person; I can't believe my mom would send me to live with such a malicious bitch!" Now don't get me wrong I was raised to respect my elders and especially people who were helping you but at the same time I was raised to stand up for myself. If I'd had known what was going to follow my outburst though I think I would've kept quiet. It was like as soon as the last word left my mouth I felt myself being smacked across the face. And I mean really slapped, like you'd slap someone who had spat in your face. Before it could fully register to me that Addie Mae had just slapped me she did it again, then again and again. She carried on slapping me across my face until I just crumbled to the ground, but that didn't phase her at all. I didn't even see the big problem; my mom would have just yelled at me then finished tossing my things away. I guess that wasn't Addie Mae's way though, because once I crumbled to the ground after being slapped across the face a good ten times, she continued to hit me. She reached down and grabbed me by my hair and literally drug me the distance back to the house. We reached her porch steps and she threw me down against them, walking up the stairs she stood over my slumped down form against the stairs. Slowly glancing up towards Addie Mae I noticed her glowering down at me, in a flash she had her hand wrapped into my hair pulling me up. Once I was pulled up onto the porch she started to slap me again. After a few slaps I slipped out of her grasp and moved away a foot or so. That action didn't please Addie Mae; she walked away and reached behind her wooden rocking chair. Turning back towards me I noticed her holding something in her hand. As she walked back near me I realized what she had in her hand, it was a leather strap that was about three inches wide in width. Before I could even raise my hands in a defensive stance she swung her hand out and the leather strap smacked against my upper arm. The sting from the smack was unbelievable, I've had my share of fights and injuries but nothing compared to the instant pain I felt. I screamed out and tried to recoil away from her but that only made her swing her hand holding the leather strap towards me faster. She repeatedly made contact with my arms, shoulders and even parts of my chest. I could barely stand from the pain but I refused to crumble onto the porch again, merely for fear that she'd beat me to an inch of my life if she were to be standing over me. After about fifteen minutes of her hard quick blows with the strap she stopped and told me" now are you ever going to speak to me like you have any say in the matter of your life here?" With tears running down my cheeks I shook my head no, I would've done or said anything just to keep her from beating me once again. After answering her she walked into the house and called to me, very slowly I walked into the house. That night was the worse (or the worse to that day) ever, I couldn't cope with the constant pain and stinging I felt. The facial pain was bad but it didn't compare to the mammoth pain I felt in my arms and shoulders. Even the smallest tasks brought me to the brink of screaming out in pain, I had to even sleep with my arms raised over my head. Not having a mirror anywhere's in the house, I had no idea how bad I looked. I could see the wallops and bruises on my arms and shoulders and they looked horrible. Years ago my Jovee had taught me how to heal injuries and wounds with simple household things, but as we sat down for supper that night Addie Mae refused to let me use or even try any of them. She made me suffer through it.

My first day of school at Bon Temps High was a long and awkward day. Because Addie Mae had destroyed all of my clothing I was forced to wear some of her clothing. And because of the beating I received the day before I had to wear long sleeved shirts. I went to school in a pair of my loosest jeans and one of her large cotton sweatshirts. I walked to the "bus stop" and quietly waited for the bus to arrive. I had thoughts that morning and the night before of running away and going back to New Orleans, but deep down I knew if I did then my mother would take extreme measures. I didn't have any doubt that my mother would ship me off to a juvenile delinquent center, and the beating from Addie Mae could be nothing compared to what I'd endure in such a place. So I sucked it up and just decided to stay with Addie Mae until my mother let me go home or I turned of legal age and left on my own. The bus ride to school was uneventful, as not many people were on the bus. I spoke to no one; I made eye contact with not a soul. I kept my eyes fixed on the passing by scenery, which was basically all the same; trees and bayous mostly. I couldn't even relax on the drive to school because leaning back into the seat irritated and hurt my shoulders. Once getting to the school I still stayed to myself, I didn't want to be bothered by people or their nice demeanors. I walked from class to class not looking at anyone; I sat in class after class just flipping through my textbooks. At lunch I didn't even bother with eating my lunch, it sat on its plate until I decided to dump it in the trash. I slightly glanced around at people in little groups, and I yearned so badly to be back with my friends. I found myself almost screaming out as a passing teacher patted me on the shoulder. The rest of the day slowly went by and I found myself on the bus once again heading towards my "bus stop". I lazily left the bus and started my walk back to Addie Mae's house, once I saw her road coming into view I felt myself filled with dread and fear. I made it home and went straight to Addie Mae to inquire what was I to do, she informed me of the chores I had to accomplish before I could start doing my given homework. I worked through the chores within two hours then I went to my room and spent the next three hours gradually doing my homework. I wanted to spend as much time as I could away from her, for fear that I'd somehow do or say something to anger her once again.

My life went on like that for about five months; I went to school and stayed to myself. I made no friends or even any acquaintances; I felt no need to speak with anyone. I'd do my daily chores without any sort of restraint. I had become so withdrawn that my life felt like it was all planned out for me, that Addie Mae controlled every second of my life. I continued to wear Addie Mae's large sweat shirts to school even after the bruises had healed and disappeared. My once nicely styled hair was now undyed and back to its original curly style. The pumpkin orange was showing more than I'd ever let it since I was about twelve years old. From my lack of proper hair products or having my hair flat ironed at least twice a week, it returned to the frizzy curly manner it had been for almost all of my life. Addie Mae despised the fact that I was a vegetarian, so because I refused to eat meats she'd make me consume plates full of lard filled vegetables. Vegetables that I had to check on daily and then pick from a garden. I mentioned one time about all the lard she cooked with, that resulted in her throwing a hot grease (melted lard) filled, cast iron skillet at me. Needless to say I ended up with burns on my hands and arms, which like the previous bruises, were left uncared for. Someone upstairs must've been watching over me though because the burns never became infected. Never again did I say anything when she'd prepare my meals. I'd eat as much as I could force myself to, but the foods she fed me weren't very nourishing and I found myself losing pound after pound. I never heard anything from my mother or other family members in New Orleans, I knew that my mother sent Addie Mae a monthly check for things I might need though. I yearned for my family and previous life.


	3. Social Occurences

Social Occurrences

I went eight long drawn out months with only having Addie Mae to socially interact with. By my sixth month of living in Palle Vilatte, even my teachers had stopped trying to be civil and sociable. No one paid me any attention at school any longer; it was as if I were just a shadow of a person. I still received beatings from Addie Mae they were just as fierce as ever. I learned to keep my mouth shut and merely do as I was told. Even in my withdrawn state of mind I'd somehow enrage Addie Mae. But I did seem to please her in some ways, my teachers and consoler would send home letters of praise about my grades. No longer did I have to be told about chores I should do, I just did everything I felt needed to be done. When Addie Mae and her group of friends started to do their weekly get togethers at Addie Mae's I was on my best behavior. I was polite and respectful no matter what cruel opinions they voiced or even the times when Addie Mae would point out how sinful I had been in my life before moving there. They were a group of six or seven older women with such closed minds; they all had the same outlooks on things. Addie Mae made it crystal clear that I wasn't to speak to her friends unless they asked me a question.

On one particular weekly "meeting" I was told that the following night they would hold a night get together. The oldest lady of the group Mrs. Bordeaux informed me that it was a meeting held for me. Having heard that I was very confused but didn't voice it, I kept quiet until all the ladies had left. Once Addie Mae and I were alone I asked her what Mrs. Bordeaux meant that it was a meeting for my benefit. After voicing my question to Addie Mae I instantly became filled with fear of her reaction. But surprisingly she answered me. Her answer was" it's a get together that has gone on in these parts for hundreds of years, all of the groups mothers and grandmothers have done them, it's a congregation to assess if our group will flourish with adding your powers to it."

I was shocked silent, knowing better than most how Addie Mae and her lady friends felt about anything they deemed "unholy". To hear that they all were descendant from women whom had "powers" was honestly mind blowing. But before I could even begin to form a reply I was told even more. Addie Mae informed me that for months they had spoken about me, that they could feel I had powers beyond anything they had ever seen. Even though I knew that I having an opinion on the matter was going to end in a beating, I couldn't stop myself. I told Addie Mae" no I wont do it, Jovee told me long ago to never do anything of the sort, she told me never participate in group events, she warned me to keep my powers hidden and only reveal them when I felt safe, Addie Mae I don't feel safe so no way am I agreeing to this." Without any type of warning Addie Mae's fury exploded at my refusal and she threw the coffee cup she was holding at me. Addie Mae had accurate aim because the cup smashed into the side of my head right on mark. I grasped my head and tried to run towards my bedroom but I was stopped when Addie Mae grabbed me by the arm and threw me against the kitchen counter. Like a cat on a mouse she was in front of me with her hand wrapped tightly around my throat. As I have stated I've been in fights before and hell I've even been through months of beatings from her, but never had I been choked. It's an experience I never wanted to feel again, to know someone has my life literally in their hands is very alarming. Placing her face right up next to mines she hatefully glared into my eyes and told me" you'll either agree to do it or I'll end you right now, you little ungrateful bitch!" I knew I had only one option if I wanted to live through this night so I lowered my eyes and nodded an agreement. She tighten her hand around my neck to get her point across then she slowly let go, right before her hand left my neck completely she shoved to the side and pushed me away from her. Gasping for a deep full breath I found myself unsteady and I tumbled slightly to the side and banged my head on the counter. I fell to the ground with a thump and just laid there hoping she'd just leave me alone.

Sleep didn't come easy that night; I tossed and turned the entire night. When I would fall to sleep I found myself having horrible nightmares and I'd pop right up in bed. I knew better than to scream out or anything. So I laid there with my blankets pulled to my neck and silently cried. I begged for a way out of here, I prayed for a sign from Jovee or Granny Bern telling me what to do. I had no option but to partake in Addie Mae's "meeting" that night. I began to get a headache from sitting there trying my hardest to think up a solution for my upcoming situation. Knowing that normally I'd not get a headache from such a meager thing as thinking I reached up and began to massage my head. As soon as my fingertips touched my right temple though I pulled them away because a sharp pain shot through my head. It felt like as if someone were literally inside my brain stabbing a shaft of some sort entirely through my head, from my forehead through my brain to the back of my head. I knew without a doubt I had a bruise either formed or forming on my forehead, there was a slight cut there also. I just prayed that it wasn't to the point that stitches would've been needed. I knew ways to ease my pain and even had a few tricks to rid myself of the injury. But I was so terrified that if the next day when Addie Mae saw me she didn't see her "handiwork" then I'd end up getting another beating.

I don't recall anything else from that night or much from the following day. What I do remember fairly well is the meeting that night. The "ladies" came over about an hour after the sun had set; the night was hot and oh so humid. The mosquitos were out in full force, everywheres I looked I saw bugs in the air. As the ladies approached Mrs. Bordeaux was in the lead, she lead the way into the woods that I knew would bring us to the bayou. Before I stepped off the porch I sent out one last pleading prayer to Jovee and Granny Bern. Knowing I had no choice in the matter I slowly descended the stairs and followed behind Addie Mae and her "group of lady friends". There were no words spoken between anyone as we walked further into the woods and I saw the bayou come into view. Before we reached the edges of the bayou we took a turn to the right and walked another 20 feet into a clearing I never even knew was there. As we all walked into the clearing the ladies started to form a circle. As I was about to step into finish forming the circle Mrs. Bordeaux grinned and told me" No, no cherie your position is in the middle." Snapping my head up to look towards Mrs. Bordeaux then to Addie Mae I knew from the fierce look on Addie Mae's face that I had better do as I was told, and quickly. I walked into the circle and hung my head not knowing what to do. Silently I begged and pleaded with Jovee and Granny Bern to please in any way shape or form help me. But I knew in my heart that there wasn't going to be any help from them or anyone else tonight. I was on my own. So being the stubborn prideful person I am I snapped my head up and glared at each and every one of the group. I let my gaze linger on Addie Mae more than I did any of the others. Slowly and softly I heard Mrs. Bordeaux begin to speak. Her words became louder and with more conviction behind them. She had spoken for maybe five minutes before I can even recall what she said. But then she said something that grabbed my attention and made my glare go from Addie Mae to Mrs. Bordeaux. I remember being beyond belief at the comment she had just made.

Mrs. Bordeaux was saying" Last night our world was thrown into turmoil, our souls are being put up against a test. Those evil blood suckers made themselves known and now we are all supposed to welcome them with open arms. Vampires are not human, they never were, and they are merely Lucifer's minions sent here to destroy. Their existence is a test to see if our faith and loyalty will stay in our lord. I refuse to sit back and let monsters from the fires of hell take over my state." Slowly she looks around from person to person before she continues her rants." Our families were the first ones to settle in Louisiana, our ancestors hands were the hands to form the lands as they are now, much bloodshed has been caused to our peoples from day one, our blood runs through the waters of this state." Staring over at me she continues" and you, you're a gift to all of us, the last time someone of your magnitude walked this earth was many a great moons ago, its rumored in the folklore that as our Indian descendants began to breed with the French from Canada that a girl child would be born who possessed gifts like no one had seen before, and as she was born and then died as a childless adult the assumed bloodline died. Then along came Bernadette (my granny Bern) and she had gifts that nobody had saw, she could heal any injury by merely touching a person. Bernadette though refused to join a group and as she did she was cast out and ended up marrying a man of Indian descendant too. Bernadette furthered her skills and partook strongly in the Hoodoo rituals, which made her powers stronger. Then along comes you, the 50th female grandchild of Bernadette's son. You the female child born without ever having seen the face of her father, you the last child for Bernadette to touch and bestow her gift upon. You posses more powers than all of us combined, for when your Granny Bern passed away she had to leave her powers to someone and you being the last child for her to touch they were handed down to you." I remember blinking about a hundred times in a minute, trying to wrap my mind around everything she had just told me. But before everything could fully sink in Mrs. Bordeaux started speaking again." You posses gifts that even Bern didn't, she was a great healer and seer but never a telekinetic or an elemental. Your powers have yet to show their full strength but they will, and you're so young they will rip you apart. They will make you mad with power, they will destroy any chance you ever had at a life, and they'll make peoples loath and fear you. And cherie that's not something you want, I can see it in your eyes that you yearn for acceptance and love, your lonely and afraid. So I came up with a solution to all the problems facing you my child." Glancing towards Addie Mae she nods and then Addie Mae steps forward and starts to speak." You will be allowed to socialize with others only at school, never is anyone allowed near this house and you're never allowed to anyone else's home. You won't have to take the bus to school anymore as your mother's youngest brother has given you his former car as a gift and I am allowing you to have it. Your chores will be cut down to every other day instead of daily. But in return for such freedoms you will have to obey not only me but also Mrs. Bordeaux completely." Having heard I'll be allowed to have a somewhat normal life I nod a quick agreement before I even ask what having to obey not only Addie Mae but also Mrs. Bordeaux meant.

After agreeing to Addie Mae's proposal I felt myself start to smile, but that was very short lived. As the next thing I knew within no more than three minutes the circle was closing in on me. I remember seeing all of their eyes glowing happily and hungrily at me as they closed in even closer. I looked right into Addie Mae's eyes and I saw pure hatred aimed at me, and then everything went black. That was the last thing I remember from that night. Next thing I knew I was waking up in the clearing alone, in the lightening sky.


	4. Bon Temps High Homecoming Game

Bon Temps High Homecoming Game

Things with Addie Mae never did fully change. I must admit that I felt less stressed at school and began to speak with people if they spoke to me. The chore days would vary from every other day, to two consecutive days then back to every other day. I was grateful though for any days I had to myself and without having to do her chores. The beatings of course never ended, if I stepped out of line in any small way I'd end up getting hit. I had to partake in weekly "meetings" with Mrs. Bordeaux, Addie Mae and the other five or six ladies. The ladies especially Mrs. Bordeaux were very interested in the "powers" I had come to acquire from Granny Bern. Most of the meetings I'd only be required to show off about ten minutes of different things I could do. Then the rest of their meetings were filled with talk about how mine and their powers combined could be used for the greater good. I'd say about six weeks after that night meeting, had come to pass and things weren't great but they were better. Bon Temps High was getting ready for their homecoming game against their long time rivals from Clarice. The one person I had considered a friend was a Creole girl named Bianca. Bianca lived with her grandmother because her parents abandoned her as a baby, and it just so happened to be that Bianca's grandmother and Mrs. Bordeaux had been raised along side one another. So when one day at school Bianca mentioned the upcoming homecoming game and dance, I had an idea that maybe I would be allowed to attend them. Seeing how Bianca's grandma and Addie Mae's "mentor" were such good friends. After days of Bianca pestering me to ask Addie Mae if I could go to both or at least one of the events, I finally relented and asked her one evening.

I had to beg and plead for hours on end but still Addie Mae refused, she kept saying I wasn't fully trustworthy yet. So knowing she'd never change her mind I gave up on asking and just went to my room "closet". As I awoke the next morning to begin getting ready to walk to my bus stop (seeing how I wasn't allowed to drive the car my uncle had given me as of yet) I noticed Addie Mae sitting out on the front porch. Normally by the time I left for school she was already sitting in the kitchen reading one of her many (religious fanatic) books drinking a cup of coffee. But not this day, as I noticed her on the porch I began to walk further away from the side of the porch she was occupying, simply because I hadn't any idea how to take this change in her normal routine. As I was descending the stairs she began to speak, and when Addie Mae spoke I knew to listen very closely. Plainly put Addie Mae stated" you're allowed to go to that ridiculous football game tomorrow evening, but only the game nothing more. You may drive there in that car (pointing over to my now leaf covered gift of a car), you're to drive right there and right back. I know exactly how much time it takes to get there and back. Bianca is the only person I approve of you speaking with or even acknowledging, there will be hundreds of people there. So if you think you can sneak and go against me just remember I will find out. You're to be respectful yet silent if anyone besides Bianca tries to speak with you. I'm going against my better judgments, but I can not go against my "superiors". If you embarrass me in any way or go against my rules, I swear to all that is holy the punishments you will get will be 100x's worse than anything you've ever experienced before." In the midst of her ranting she had stood up and walked over to the stairs so she now stood over me. Grabbing me by the collar of my shirt she yanked forward and menacingly said "do you understand me girl?" Fighting the urge to yank back away from her and respond with a stubborn comment I just nodded my head and mumbled" yes Addie Mae I fully understand and thank you so much, I promise I won't embarrass you in any way." Knowing that she must feel my lack of reluctance towards her rules and threats she releases me and heads into the house. Feeling relieved and yet pensive at the same time I once again begin my trek to the soon arriving school bus.

As I sat back on the ride to school I tried to calm myself down. My emotions were flaring and the main one was anger, for I knew without a doubt in my mind why Addie Mae had so suddenly decided to let me attend the game. On one side of my brain I was elated to know that I had a friend that would do just about anything in her powers to help make me happy. But on the other side of my brain I was livid to know that now because of outside interference into a "family "situation I would most likely have to do things for Addie Mae and possibly even her "ladies group" that normally I'd try to resist. As the bus neared the school I was full of such an immense amount of irritation that I knew if I didn't rein it in even a little that I was going to explode as soon as I laid eyes on Bianca. I silently hoped that I wouldn't run across Bianca until later in the day which would mean I would've had some more time to cool off. But as faith had it I wasn't granted anything of the sort. As soon as I stepped into the school, there was Bianca walking up to me with a huge smile on her face. Before I could turn to walk the other way or anything there she was two feet in front of me. She was beaming with happiness and pride, but I was scolding at her. I saw her parting her lips to speak and before one syllable could pass her lips I jumped in with guns blazing.

Some how I stayed quiet enough that only myself and Bianca could hear the entire conversation. I began by saying" well I guess the assumption I've had all morning since leaving home is correct. Really Bianca something as trivial as a fucking football game and a dance is so important to you? It wasn't your place to butt in on things having to do with my home life. Kudos you and your grandmother got Addie Mae to agree to me going to the homecoming game, but at what cost? Do you have any idea what is going to happen to me if just one person has a bad opinion of me tomorrow night? No you don't know jack shit about anything like that, simply because you'll never have to worry over such things. Your constant need to put your nose into others business is going to cost me dearly this time, you couldn't in your worse nightmares imagine the horrible things Addie Mae can and most likely will do to me. And why? Simply because now I owe her..." before Bianca could utter any kind of response I walked away.

The rest of the school day I avoided running into Bianca, it was hurting me so much inside to have to blatantly ignore my closest friend. But I was still so full of fury over the stupid decision she made. In my mind it was like basically Bianca was more worried about her being happy (us going to the homecoming game and dance) than she was concerned about the repercussions I'd face for her butting into Addie Mae and my business. As the day dragged on I sat in my second to last class and paid no attention to the lesson being taught that day, my mind was too filled with trying to find a solution to my current problem. Knowing there was a 50/50 chance that Bianca's sudden bad mood over the fight we'd gotten into this morning might be shown at home in front of her grandmothers eyes, I racked my brain for a way to keep it all hush hush. I ran through my mind like one would a file cabinet looking for an urgent file, as I was just about to give up I remembered something my mother had told me years ago. She mentioned to me that during her childhood her oldest brother became friends with someone who in their eyes was "bad". So Granny Bern performed a "ritual" that would wipe my uncle's existence from his new friends mind completely, that it would be as if they'd never met before. Trying to pull the memory up in my mind of the "image" my mother had shown me of the ritual Granny Bern did, I smiled to myself because it was a simple ritual. Silently thanking Granny Bern for her skill in using common everyday items to perform her many rituals. I glanced up and noticed there was ten minutes of this class left. Stuffing my books and things into my book bag I left out one piece of paper, knowing it was the first thing I'd need to accomplish my ritual. The bell began to blare out its signal that the given hour of lessons were over, I got up from my desk and made my way out the door into the slowly crowding hallway. I made my way to the nearest girl's restroom and thankfully there was a few girl's in there smoking cigarettes before the next class. I walked near them and asked" can I borrow a lighter?" all of the girls looked towards me and at first it was like today was the first time I'd stepped into this world. The tallest of the group handed me her lighter and I walked into the nearest stall, as I closed and locked the door I pulled out the piece of paper I had written on in class. Giving the paper one last look I closed my eyes and silently said" burn the memories of me from her mind" before I finished saying all of it I flicked the lighter and put it to the paper. As the paper caught on fire I placed my hand over the open toilet bowl and watched as the paper burnt and turned to ash. I handed the lighter over the door back to its owner and looked at the papers ashes sitting in the toilet bowl. Knowing this was it there was no turning back I closed my eyes again and silently said" as the memories are burnt from her eyes, now wash my existence from her mind". And I pushed down the level to flush the toilet; slowly I watched the ashes swirl around in the water then flow down the drain. Gradually I left out a heavy breathe then opened the door and walked out.

As the following evening drew closer and closer I found myself filled with turmoil, I didn't know if to fess up and tell Addie Mae that Bianca and I were no longer friends and I had no want to attend the game or if to just go alone. I knew this was a once in a lifetime event, that I wasn't going to see many times of freedom. So I decided to just keep my mouth shut about Bianca and I and go alone, I figured Addie Mae would never find out. I began to get ready for my night out and away from my horrible "guardian"; I didn't own anything better than the normal everyday school attire. So I settled on a pair of semi-fitted jeans, a long knitted red and white sweater Addie Mae had given me (it was intended to be for herself but she didn't made it wide enough) a pair of classic black work boots and a red "ski cap". Feeling I looked respectful enough to appease Addie Mae's judging eye, I walked out of my bedroom and into the living room. Seeing Addie Mae's eyes drift up and down my body I stood there and waited for her criticism, slowly she began to circle me like a predator does its prey. I stood there totally still and waited for her insults to start flying, but they never did. As she circled back till she was facing me, her eyes locked with mines as she reached over and grabbed my chin. I knew then that she was about to begin another rant, so I stood there patiently waiting. After about two full minutes of her with her hand under my chin and her eyes locked with mines she began to speak.

"You better remember my warnings and rules, and know that any punishments you may receive will be of your own doings. You have until 9pm to be home, if you're even a minute late I will inform the police that you're a runaway and a thief. I know the exact miles it will take, to and then from the school, if that car has more miles on it than I know it takes. Well then for ever mile it's over or short then that's how many times you will feel the leather strap on your bare back. Do you understand me?" Glaring back into Addie Mae's eyes I slowly nodded my head. As she releases my chin and steps away I let out a slow shaky breathe. I know better than to leave a room without first getting her approval, so I stand there as she slowly walks back over to the couch. She settles herself into a comforting position then waves her hand at me indicating my dismissal. I make my way out the door and to the car before I feel safe enough to inhale a deep breath. Slowly letting it out I open the car door and begin my journey to the football field at the high school. I have driven about a thousand times before and on the traffic littered streets of New Orleans, but I had never been as nervous as I was now. Addie Mae hadn't told me the mileage I was expected to use tonight so I kept glancing down at it to see if and when the numbers changed. Being on backwoods country woods was a hassle on its own, and it was even worse when one constantly was looking down checking the odometer. Finally after what felt like the longest drive of my life I made it to the football field, I had only ever seen it from a distant on my daily bus rides.

It was a nice sized stadium, granted it didn't compare in size to the Superdome or even Tiger Stadium (I had been to both venues many times for sporting events or concerts in the past with my family and friends). As I stood in the line waiting to be let in I continued to mentally size the football stadium up in my mind, trying to gauze its size to others I had been to. The line of awaiting people moved fairly well, within five minutes I was three people back from the beginning of the line. As I reached the front of the line and had to show my school id card for free admittance I glanced around and saw more people than I had the entire time I've been living here. Finding myself in the crowd of people I started to smile because I felt at home. Having lived my whole life up until I got shipped to Addie Mae's surrounded by my large family and having been raised in a city like New Orleans, crowds were my thing.


End file.
